Every January, I take a great big gulp of ambition juice. My blood flows with enthusiasm, hope, and a burst of energy that could rival Sunny D in the neon color/sugar department. I pull out a clean pad of paper, a fancy felt-tip pen (the purchase of which I justified by assuring myself I’d be more likely to complete any tasks that were written in its lovely, smooth ink), and write down my New Year’s resolutions. While my resolutions change from year to year, they usually look something like this:
Do yoga. Take a French class. Learn to salsa. Read the classic novels I missed in high school. Call home every week. Go to bed at 9 p.m. Write snail mail. Save the planet.
All are honorable goals. My completion rate? Somewhere in the neighborhood of “zero” to “Does wearing yoga pants count as the same thing as doing yoga?” Maybe you’ve run into similar issues.
The reoccurring problem with my past resolutions lists is that every single item on them is related to DOING. I am asking myself to magically squeeze more activities into the same 24 hours, without taking anything away. I tell myself I will cut back on “other things,” but I never really define what those things are. Inevitably, I stretch myself too thin, and at one point or another, I fall short. This year, I decided to take a different approach to my New Year’s resolutions. I’m not writing them. I’m writing down my intentions instead. The difference between a resolution and an intention might seem frivolous at first glance, but when you look more closely, far more separates them than simply an entry in a thesaurus. Resolutions are stiff.
Resolutions are boxes to be checked, with only one method for doing so. Resolutions look like a to-do list. You either complete a resolution or you don’t. Resolutions are focused on doing.
Intentions are flexible.
Intentions represent my hopes, values, and who I want to be a year from now. Intentions look like a map with many paths that lead to the goal destination. Intentions are focused on my being.
I decided to keep my intentions list to my top four intentions.
Yes, FOUR. I know Top 10 sounds cool and Top 5 at least sounds reasonable, but for the sake of being super seriously focused and dedicated, I decided to stick with just the four most important. Instead of writing my intentions as a stiff list of to-dos (that approach reminds me of the failed resolutions of prior years), I wrote them as the values and characteristics—the being—that I want to characterize my year. To make my intentions tangible, below each I wrote out a variety of actions I can take to bring them to life. Some actions might work, while others might not. The beauty of this more flexible approach is that if and when I fall short on one action, that does not mean that I will miss the boat on completing the intention entirely. Rather, it means I need to try a different approach next time.
2018 Intention Number One: Be Present.
Ways I Plan to Be Present:
Put my phone away during dinner, including dinner at home with Ben. Ask follow-up questions during conversations with friends instead of jumping right in with my own thoughts and opinions (extrovert problems). Respond to text messages in hours instead of days. (I am really the worst with texts. SORRY.) Spend 10 minutes in quiet reflection each morning. I use a guided meditation app called Headspace (LOVE IT and cannot recommend it enough), and I find that when I use it daily, I am more present, focused, and less prone to anxious or worried thoughts all day long. Call friends or family while washing dishes instead of defaulting to turning on the TV.
2018 Intention Number Two: Be Grateful.
Ways I Plan to Be Grateful:
2018 Intention Number Three: Be Rested.
Ways I Plan to Be Rested:
2018 Intention Number Four: Be Inspired.
Ways I Plan to Be Inspired: WHAT DO YOU THINK?
Does thinking of your 2018 goals as intentions instead of resolutions resonate with you the way it did with me? Am I crazy and this is a glorified list of resolutions with some extra frosting? What’s on your list of intentions for 2018?
Here’s to a happy, inspired, intentional 2018!
